I heard a song in church this morning that I had never heard before. I cannot get the lyrics out of my mind, They speak to me - right. where. I am. in this moment.
"I raise a hallelujah, in the presence of my enemies.
I raise a hallelujah, louder than my unbelief.
I raise a hallelujah, fear has lost it's hold on me.
I raise a hallelujah, I will watch the darkness flee."
Why do these lyrics speak to me? Because God never promised that we wouldn't have storms in our life. He never promised us an easy life. But He DOES promise to walk with us thru the storms. He does promise a rainbow after the flood.
I do not pretend to be anything that I am not. I am in the midst of a storm, not just any storm; I am battered and ripped to shreds. I have been in such despair that all I can think about is to go to sleep and never come out of the covers. Depression so overwhelming that I cannot physically see a single good thing about myself. Overwrought with grief that attempts to smother the very breath that I need to live. Satan has been using tactics to attack my mind, my intelligence, my sense of self worth, my overall opinion of myself, and my drive to move forward.
This isn't the first of these storms I have encountered - always the same. The enemy knows me too well.
Yes, I am the very person that I try so hard to reach thru this ministry. Because no matter the storm, no matter the lies that are whispered in my ear - I have a HOPE within me that swells up and demands to be acknowledged.
For today, I choose to just act on faith. I will put my faith in front of my thoughts, emotions, and pain.
"I'm gonna sing, in the middle of the storm.
Louder and louder, you're gonna hear my praises roar!
Up from the ashes, HOPE WILL ARISE.
Death is defeated, the King is alive.
Sing a little louder, heaven comes to fight for me."
If you are in the midst of storm, I encourage you to just raise a hallelujah and sing louder than the enemy's lies. Though the storms rage and the wind blows, we have THE help in times of trouble. God meets us in the storm.
(song credit: Raise a Hallelujah by Bethel Music)